The Single Dad Next Door Read online

  Maggie could hear the river below but couldn’t see it through the thick haze.

  She smoothed out the blanket and dropped to her knees, sitting back on her heels. “This is truly one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen.”

  Kellen lowered himself close to her. She could feel the fabric of his sleeve as it touched her arm. Take his hand. She shook the thought away.

  He didn’t take his eyes off her. “It sure is.”

  Maggie grabbed his chin and pointed at the floating bridge. “That. You goofball.”

  They sat with a cloak of awed silence wrapped around them for a few minutes. Maggie watched Kellen out of the side of her vision. He seemed deep in thought; perhaps she should be, too. She glanced back at the bridge. The top of the fog reached the bottom boards and flowed over them like a rising flood.

  Wanting to break the silence, Maggie sighed. “You know, most of the time I feel like that bridge probably does.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “As beautiful as it is right now, it’s all alone. It’s completely surrounded by that fog. From its perspective, it has no idea what’s all around it.” Maggie drew up her knees, wrapping her arms around them. “For all that bridge knows, Godzilla could be waiting under it in that fog, or a cannon could be aimed right at it, ready to destroy the bridge completely. The bridge is completely clueless because of the fog. My life is a lot like that.”

  Kellen half smiled at her. “If you really think there might be a giant lizard huddling in the small space under the bridge, then I’m sorry I didn’t bring my camera.”

  There was probably enough room for a giant bear or two to hide in the fog, but definitely not a city-destroying lizard. It was funny to think about it just the same.

  Maggie yanked her phone from her back pocket and gave it a triumphant pump in the air. “Behold. The power of the camera phone. It may not be a smartphone, but this puppy still can snap a picture if it has to. That scaly monster won’t be able to get too far away before I can take a million pictures of him with this.” She winked at Kellen, who wore a goofy grin as he watched her. “I’ll sell the photos for millions and then we’ll build a cabin and live happily there forever on our Godzilla riches.” A huge smile tugged on Maggie’s lips. She used to have a quick wit that never failed to make her sister or Caleb laugh. It had been too long since she felt safe enough to be silly. She’d figured a woman her age was past that. But Kellen’s chuckles made her believe that joking might be a lifelong thing.

  “Will we, now?” Kellen emphasized the we. “Okay, now that we have the Godzilla plan finalized, what’s this about you feeling alone?”

  The sun had crept onto the horizon since they arrived, slicing rays into the fog.

  She laced her fingers together and stared at them for a moment. “Maybe alone isn’t the right word.” She shrugged, struggling to make him understand. “I mean, Goose Harbor is a tight-knit place. Everyone knows of me, but no one knows me. I hope that makes sense. And I have friends—some really amazing ones—but there is a divide. I’m probably explaining this wrong. So not alone, but more like separate or different.”

  “Separate and different... Is that such a bad thing?”

  “It is when the different part means you’re thirty-five and don’t have a husband or a future mapped out.” Had she just blurted her age to him? Heat crept up her neck. Not that he probably hadn’t figured out that she was older, but now she’d confirmed it for him. Too late to take it back now, she pressed forward. “Or when you’re separate because everyone has moved on in life, leaving you in the same place you were when they left ten or more years ago.”

  Kellen scrubbed his hand over his chin. “You mentioned a man by the name of Alan before.”

  He’d listened closely. She’d mentioned Alan only once.

  “Ah yes.” Maggie rocked forward a bit. “What is there to say about him? Alan was the ‘don’t worry about it, babe,’ starving-artist type. Pursing his dream of painting was his number one drive. I should have seen it at the time, but I think at that point I was so desperate to be in a relationship—any relationship—that I settled below my standards.”

  Kellen dropped his hand to the blanket. “Do you care if I ask what those standards are?”

  “Does it even matter anymore? I’ve long given up on a Prince Charming coming along, so I tossed the list out years ago.”

  “But you remember some of the list, don’t you?”

  “Strong morals. Christian background. When I was young I dreamed of being my husband’s first kiss.” She laughed once, but the sound held no humor.

  Kellen’s Adam’s apple bobbed.

  “Alan spent more time and effort honing his craft than actually speaking to me. He’d come to me when he needed to bum some money. You know, because working a nine-to-five gig messed with his muse. Some hogwash along those lines.”

  “Gotcha.” Kellen rolled his eyes. “He was one of those artists.”

  “And then some.” Maggie pushed up from the ground. “My friends warned me about him, but I didn’t listen. It’s funny how much you can lie to yourself in an effort to protect your heart.”

  She paced to the edge of the bridge. Most of the fog had rolled away and she could see the river. “I should have seen it coming, but I didn’t. Alan grew tired of Goose Harbor. He said it didn’t stimulate his mind enough. I made the mistake of loaning him most of my savings.” Or all. “He told me if I loved him I shouldn’t have qualms about doing it. He promised to come back for me. You can see how that worked out.”

  Kellen growled. “Tell me he gave you back your money.”

  Maggie shook her head. “Last I heard he’d made it to New York. I tried to track him down. I sent letters to his mother’s home in Virginia hoping she’d forward them, but they were never answered. I even filed a police report, but the investigators said they couldn’t help me, since a crime wasn’t committed. I could have gone after him in a civil trial, but that would have cost more money that I didn’t have.”

  “Could you go after him now?”

  “I’m over it and I still don’t know where he is. Besides, I never recovered financially.” She swallowed hard. Say it. Tell him. Kellen cares. Right? Even if he didn’t care, maybe he’d be less inclined to cut her from the inn’s staff when the chance came. “I feel like a loser admitting this to you, but I have almost no money to my name. There were medical expenses for my mom that needed paying, and those two things wiped me out. Ida only gave me what I needed.”

  Her back to Kellen, she heard him shift—rising—and take a few steps. Beside her, still looking down at where the river met the lake, he laced his fingers through hers and gave her hand a pump. They stood like that, palm to palm, for a few minutes.

  “I’m sorry that happened to you,” he whispered.

  “It was so long ago.” She pursed her lips. “It’s nothing.”

  “But it is.” He tugged on her arm lightly, turning her to face him. “Love should never be used as a weapon. Not as a tool to manipulate someone.”

  His eyes searched hers, silently asking questions she didn’t know the answers to.

  Maggie pivoted so they were shoulder to shoulder again. In a hoarse voice she hardly recognized, she whispered, “I don’t know what I’m doing with my life anymore. I might not have ever really known. Everyone my age is married and starting families. If not that, then they have successful careers. What do I have? Nothing. I have a job at an inn that I could lose at any moment.”

  “You have that job for as long as you want it.”

  “Thank you.” She took a shuddering breath and brushed her hair away from her face. “This is probably a much heavier conversation than you were hoping to have this morning.”

  “This is perfect.” He turned her toward him again and placed both of his hands on her shoulders. M
aggie hooked her hands over his biceps. The guitarist had been hiding his muscles.

  He locked gazes with her. “I want to know you, Maggie. If you haven’t noticed, I have trouble trusting people and believing the best about them. You make me want to do that, though. It took me a while to get over my past, but I’m here. I believe the best about you.”

  She licked her lips. What should she say to that? I believe the best about you, too. But did she? Last night she’d stumbled on more internet articles about Kellen. Rumors of him dating a string bean of a woman only months ago. Another one about an A-list starlet who regularly commented about the fact that he was her dream man.

  The look in Kellen’s eyes said he wanted to be with Maggie. That he cared about her. In fact, if her feminine radar was working correctly today, she’d guess Kellen was a few encouraging words away from kissing her. Did she want that? Yes. No. Maybe? How many women had he kissed? She wouldn’t compare to what he was used to.

  Removing a hand from her shoulder, he used it to tip up her chin. “Do you feel any better after saying that stuff?”

  “I still feel very surrounded by that fog.” His nearness was far too exhilarating. Maggie took a step back, breaking contact. She rubbed her forehead. “A little lost and unsure about my surroundings and future.”

  “Maybe you’re seeing the fog the wrong way.”

  “Meaning?”

  “What if it’s not fog at all? What if it’s a cloud of grace?” He slipped his hands into his coat pockets. “You know what? I think you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be and there is nothing wrong with not knowing what’s next. There’s a lot right about it, actually. Maybe those people with detailed plans are the wrong ones. See, you’re leaving room for God to work. And maybe—just maybe—God’s protecting you with that cloud instead of keeping things from you.”

  His words warmed her heart. She fought the desire to turn toward him because she really wanted to wrap him in a tight hug. To feel his chest rise and fall with breath against her cheek as she slipped her hands under his coat. As Ida had written, Kellen Ashby might have made mistakes in the past, but he was a man after God’s own heart now. And today was what mattered. She should have trusted him. Should have let him kiss her. Now the moment was gone.

  “A cloud of grace.” She propped her hands on her hips. “Huh. Thanks. I like that.”

  “It’s yours, free of charge.” His smile was soft, welcoming. “Seriously, Maggie, you’re safe in God’s arms. You know that, right? There’s no better place to be and there is nothing wrong with being different than everyone else.”

  It struck her that a few years ago, when she’d still been clinging to a list of ideals in a future husband, she would have written off Kellen instantly. Not that she was sure he was husband material at the moment, either, but he wouldn’t have gotten a second thought. Mentally she pretended to toss all her old ideas down into the river. Feeling lighter, she gathered up the blanket and extended a hand to Kellen. He took it and didn’t let go until they were safely back at the car.

  Chapter Twelve

  “You’re happy.” Kellen’s mom nudged him in the ribs as she leaned around him to clean off the counter. They’d decided to make French toast in the cottage that morning instead of invading the kitchen at the inn.

  “Why do you say that?”

  She stopped and held his face in her hands. “I hear you humming, whistling and singing. You’ve never been able to keep those melodies down when you were in a good mood. They just spill right out.”

  Head cocked, he rubbed his palm against the side of his neck. “I hadn’t noticed.”

  “Well, I sure have. And I know why you’re singing again.” She turned back around to the counter.

  Stepping closer, Kellen caught his mom in a tight hug before she could conquer the rest of the crumbs. “I’m glad you came. Thank you for being here. The girls love having you around. I do, too.”

  “I love you. I have for every minute since I knew I was going to have you.” Her voice sounded as though she might start crying.

  Tightening his hold, he started humming an old children’s song she’d taught him when he was in their church’s kids’ choir. Funny how the tune came back to him after it had been buried for so long. The lyrics talked about God having His hand on the sheep and how God cared about the one sheep that wandered and saved it from falling in the valley.

  Replace sheep with Kellen and the cute little Bible song about summed up his life.

  He’d turned his back on his parents for years. No communication. No trips home for Christmas. His stubborn pride had cost him so many memories. Not anymore. “I was thinking, for this Christmas and Thanksgiving, too, if I can swing it with stuff at the inn, maybe the girls and I can come to Arizona and spend the holidays with you and Dad.”

  “You know I’d love that, but what about Maggie?”

  Ah. So Mom had picked up on the glances that he and Maggie shared across the dinner table many times in the past week. Or the way she turned to smile at him first whenever one of his daughters said something funny. When he was younger, he’d thought his mother possessed superhero powers because she’d been able to read all her sons like sheets of music. Perhaps that came with being a mom.

  Kellen set his mother back so he could see her face. “What about her?”

  “Well.” His mom wrung out her dishrag and then attacked the counters in the cottage’s kitchen again. “I wouldn’t want you leaving Maggie all alone, so if you’re coming you’ll have to bring her along, too. Which would mean turning down guests at peak times, of course.”

  “Ma...”

  “Although she may insist on staying here with how tied she is to that place and all.” She tossed the rag into the sink and rinsed off her hands. “If that’s the case and none of your brothers are planning to come home, then your father and I might just have to travel back up here and share Thanksgiving with you. But we won’t be able to leave the church at Christmastime. Your dad will have to preach.”

  “There’s nothing going on between me and Maggie.”

  “Of course there’s not.” She winked at him. “But I’m just saying that a lot can happen in seven months. A whole lot.”

  Speaking of the woman in question—Kellen strained his neck to look out the window on the far edge of the kitchen. The yard between the cottage and the inn was too wide; he couldn’t spot her. Instead he pictured her spinning around in the kitchen, creating a mess while she prepared lunch. Even though they didn’t have guests until after the renovation, she’d insisted on making most of the meals for him and the girls, and Kellen hadn’t been about to turn down cooking as good as hers. Besides, the girls loved being Maggie’s helpers and he enjoyed watching Maggie interact with Skylar and Ruthy. The three of them had quickly formed a tight bond.

  Kellen swallowed hard.

  As much as they loved their grandparents, the girls would probably revolt at Christmas if they didn’t bring Maggie along.

  His heart might, too.

  “She’s a good match for you.” His mother’s voice broke into his thoughts.

  Once his mom got on a topic, she tended to act like a shark on a chum trail. He needed to redirect her or find a way to end the conversation before she started asking questions that he hadn’t allowed himself to process.

  “We should head over. Lunch is always on time.” He tapped his watch.

  He held the door open for his mother and then helped her with the rusty gate latch, too. If it weren’t for the fact that half the time there were strangers milling around on the inn’s property, he’d have removed the fence between the homes by now.

  A loud delivery truck reversed down Maggie’s driveway. Kellen spotted Maggie on the front stoop, struggling to get her arms around the huge package. Picking up his pace, he jogged over to meet her.

&nb
sp; “Here. I can get that.” Kellen waved his hand, motioning for her not to bother with the delivery. Probably one of the items he’d ordered anyway.

  “I’m okay.” Maggie bent in a way that made Kellen nervous. If the package was as heavy as it looked, she’d throw out her back carrying it up the steps, across the porch and into the inn.

  Kellen braced his hands on the top of the large box. “I know you’re fine, but I’m still going to carry this in for you.”

  “I’ve got it.” Maggie reached around him but then lost her footing and stumbled backward.

  He caught her wrist, keeping her on her feet. His thumb rested on the place where her pulse pumped on the underside of her arm and he finally looked at her. Really looked. Red-rimmed eyes that were half-lidded. Hair more puffed out to the left than the right. Chapped skin near her nose.

  “You’re sick.”

  “Thanks?” She grimaced.

  “Not— I mean, you’re not feeling well?”

  “I’ll live.” She coughed into the crook of her elbow.

  How long had she been feeling sick? Why hadn’t she called him?

  He bit back his questions. “I’ll grab the box. You get the doors.”

  “I’m strong enough to pick that up.”

  “I know that. One of the things I like about you is how capable you are.”

  “But...you said I was disorganized...” Her cheeks flushed. Fever?

  “You are disorganized, but I’m not. We make a good team that way.” He laughed. Kellen had been doing that more lately, hadn’t he?

  Finally relenting, she trudged to the front door and held it open as he lugged the box and heaved it up the stairs. She shouldn’t have been trying to lift heavy things while she was sick. What could it be? The flu didn’t usually strike in spring. A cold? Allergies?